Subject: Jss Sliving Death By: Zac Guastaferri
Date: Tue, 14 Jul 1998 18:56:12 -0500
From: dguastaferri@ameritech.net
To: fkusumot@ix.netcom.com

Hello everyone, this is Zac Guastaferri bringing you all the
exciting action from last weekends Super Series qualifier in Chicago.
Wait, did I say action? Whoops, my bad, we are juniors so their really
wasn't that much action. But I digress.

        So Friday night, me and my minion, Steve Schaub get a ride over to Tony
Baltrus's house where we are going to crash for the night. We spend the
next like 6 hours just tuning and playtesting decks, and putting the
smack on Steve who always manages to get on our nerves at the perfect
times. Anyways, the highlight of the night comes when Steve and I battle
it out in a Lunchmoney deathmatch to see who gets to sleep in the
prestigious Baltrus guest futon. I manage to get off multiple pimp
slaps, but Steve eventually finishes me. Oh well, a night in the same
room as Steve is usually a death sentence for the other guy (me), but I
manage to survive fully clothed.

        We make it to Glen Ellyn with time to spare, and meet up with fellow
team Wibble member Doug Moses. I am going to play my hard core Sliving
death, Tony is playing your standard Oath deck, while Steve (who is not
a member) is playing some RGw pile that can actually win a game or two.
Moses on the other hand, has no idea what he is going to play , but he
is leaning towards the Oath deck. When he doesn't happen upon a single
Oath of Druids, he focuses on his ensnaring fish deck that draws laughs
from us. Moses plays it anyway and just finishes his sideboard before
registaration ends. Ok, time to serve.

Round 1 Kirk something      WWx

I have known Kirk for a while, but yet I can never remember his last
name. To make matters worse, I decided that I don't even need to take
notes for this tourney. Anyways he is playing White weenie with a splash
of red for Firestorm.He is also using scrolls, but no Cataclysm or
geddon, so that's a plus.

1- I just get a better draw, as I beatdown with the Crystalline and the
Acidic while he gets mana flooded.

2- This time, he comes out charging as he's beating me in the head with
shadow guys and White knights I shoot slivers at his guys, and
incinerate the Knight, but he has a scroll out by this time. I amnage to
avoid it for a while, as he has three cards in hand. I topdeck intuition
and reach for some sexmonkey goodness, Bye scroll!
Just my luck, he busts out like two more next turn, and goes at me
again. I topdeck my best friend , living death, and back comes lots of
slivers and my two monkeys, which target uh I believe it was both of his
scrolls. he goes from 20 to 5 in a single bound (Heart Sliver is some
good), and he dies next turn

(1-0) (2-0)

Round 2 Henri Bailey  Tradewind geddon with reccuring Nightmare

I haven't had much practice against his deck, and I think he took out
Studdly Juddly last round so I am afraid.

1- I serve early on, but he eventually gets set up. I concede when he
has reccuring nightmare and survival of the fittest working at once.

2- This game seems much better for me as my sideboard pops up to say
hello. I heard pyroing tradewinds was pretty good. I also manage to
disenchant his Nightmare before hecan really abuse me. He still manages
to get set up, busting out a tradewind and a Blossom. He also has a
Feeder out so the lock is near. By this time, he is giggling like a
school girl knowing that I am close to defeat. I laugh along with him,
and then Living death to bring back FOUR crystallines, a few acidics,
some muscle, and most importantly, the winged. He gets back 2
Nekrataals, a feeder, and a tradewind, but that's useful when Crystals
on the table. It is such a great feeling when you unlock yourself from
Tradewind by bringing him back into play again. Who's laughing now,
fool!

3- We have like 5 minutes for this one, and I manage to draw Victual
just in time to handle a Man'O'war with 2 Spike counters on it.

(1-0-1) (3-1-1)


Round 3   Sam Rapson   JLA MoMA

He is playing a MoMA variant that wins by untapping a mana vault with
the MomA in order to cast huge prosperitys to run his opponent out of
cards. He wins with a cane.

1- I beat down early, and get him to 10, but he goes off and runs me out
of cards.

2- This time, my deck really comes through as I sex monkey a mana vault,
while bringing the pain with the crystalline and some muscle. After I
disenchant his MoMA, he Mediatates and concedes.

3- This game is just like game 2, but he makes a mistake in assessing
the damage I can deal, and lets me kill him without trying to go off.

(2-0-1) (5-2-1)

Round 4   Some Random who is just getting lucky  I guess you could call
it Draw-go

He is playing a pretty lame Draw-go deck, which uses that powerhouse
Reins of Power. Whatever

1- The first thing he says to me is "prepare to die." Actually it is him
who dies, as he only draws a quick sand and an Island. Crystal and
muscle are a combo, I think.

2- He plays an island, and I start the beatdown. I get an uncountered
Crystal and Acidic. I play a Muscle, and ask if it resolves. He looks at
me like I am speaking Spanish and yells yes back at me. He then procedes
to tap out to play Reins of power to steal my guys and do 8 to me. I am
sure that move would have made Andrew Cuneo very proud :) Anyways after
that spectacular play, I grab my guys back and win. He gets pissed,
picks up his cards, and probably goes to cry somewhere.

(3-0-1) (7-2-1)

Round 5 A guy

We draw, and I find out later that he was playing white weenie. Damn, I
could have been 4-0-1.

( 3-0-2) (7-2-3)

They announce the final 8 and we find that all three of us are in. Steve
just misses out on the fun. Then, they read the pairings..." Zac
Guastaferri and Tony Baltrus." Talk about a lame turn of events, our
hopes for an all wibble final are shatteres unless Moses can pull it out
against Slappy who is playing Forbidian.

Quarterfinals Tony Baltrus    The Oath deck

        I am up against some scrub who managed to make it in with the Oath of
druids deck.

1- He just crushes me with the Spirit. There is no use in recalling
details because his deck will always beat mine game one. Onto game 2!

2- He gets out an early furnace, which forces me to intuition for
disenchant. I would have obviously went for sex monkey, but I already
had one in my hand so he probably would not have let me have it. The one
in my hand was countered by the way. I start to play slivers to draw his
counters, as I eye the Living Death in my hand. Unfortunately, I was
only drawing one counter, a forbid, which he was eagerly buying back. I
finally get him to not buyback the forbid, so he now has only one card
in hand. I go, "Living death?!?" and he goes " I'll forbid that." Damn
that sucked, and it ruined my will to win. Eventually he gets me.

I go up there to accept my prize for making top 8. Being used to
Hansen's Hobbies running the tourneys, I am expecting at least half a
box. Instead my prize is 6 packs. I worked this hard for 6 packs, Those
Damn CHEAPSKATES at the legion.

I chill with Moses for a bit, and watch Tony's match against Slappy. It
runs for like two hours but Tony finally comes out victorious. He loses
in the finals to Sam Rapson, but he still qualifies. Oh well, time for
some props and slops.

Props:

Tony for qualifying

Doug for making top deck with your gay fish. Just kidding.

Dave Peterson for making that old man spaz out and drool on himself in
that booster draft tourney. That was the funniest thing I have seen in a
while.

Slops:

Steve for not making top 8. I knew you were a bad palyer, but I didn't
think you could be that bad.

The Legion for your gay prizes. I am surprised you actually gave out the
full $250 dollar travel award to the winners.

Bye for now, Zac Guastaferri

Comments and criticism is always welcome. Send E-mail to
DGuastaferri@Ameritech.com