Subject: seattle regional report Date: Sun, 17 May 1998 02:33:45 PDT From: "Stephen McAdams" To: fkusumot@ix.netcom.com This is my awesome tourney report. I got 3rd or 4th, didn't stick around to find out which one. Here ya go My First Regionals (also "They call him "Le Poupee" in France" warning: document may contain coarse and "Poupee" language. I felt a bit retarded the other day and decided to play in the Seattle Regional type II competition. I had only played about 3 Type IIs since last October, and therefore felt thoroughly qualified to apply the beatdown. The name of my chosen deck is "1/2 Gook Surprise" a fine variation of the many poopy Sliver Decks popular nowadays. THE COMPETITION Lots of stupid decks apparently, a Bloom or two, Shitloads of White Weenie (R/W Firestorm crap prevalent) some Big blue, Sliver, not much black though. Observation: 8-round tourneys take a FAWKING LONG TIME to finish, Jesus Christ! (Perhaps more than 20 minutes sleep would help.. naw) Round 1: Crappy Propaganda/Orb/Pendrell Mists/Armogeddon/Dream Cache #1 - Dude casts lotsa Diamonds, Dream Caches some, and not much else. #2 - Apparently countering the above mentioned crap was key to the Sliver beatdown. bleah I win Round 2: R/W weenie w/burn, Firestorms #1: I don't kill some shadow crap when I had the chance and die to Empyrical Armor. Whoops #2 : No colored mana, wow sucks to be me. Tithe + Firestorm is apparently new kool kombo, somebody should tell me this shit Whoops, I lose Round 3: WW, I guess #1 - Dude Mana screw, standard Crystaline + Muscle Beatdown #2 - Above, with mana this time I win Lunch Break + 20-minute Power Nap Round 4: Generic Shitty Burn Deck #1 Crystalline Sliver eats Goblin Elite Infantry, downhill from there #2 C-Slivers pretty good agains burn I win Round 5: 4(5?) Color WW/utility #1: I cast stuff, he casts stuff, I cast more stuff, I win #2: He casts crappy stuff that I kill, get tradewind land lock on him I win Round 6: Ty Holcomb's Irritating Blue Deck, Godammit #1: Ty is cool and all, but he thinks too much for his own good. Maybe it works for him, I dunno. Sliver gang flies past 3 quicksands for win. #2: Ty gets momentum going with Whispers and shit, I eventually (read: EVENTUALLY) get beat-down by Rainbow Efreets and Stalking Stones. #3: 2nd-turn Winter Orb + solo Muscle Sliver goes all the way for 20 points of damage. Orbs are good again blue, methinks I win, damn I'm smooth Round 7: Aggr Best-of-Sliver Deck #1: This one has a bit of all the Slivers, plus 2 Queens. I get beat down by Spinies and croak, none of mine wanted to come out. #2,3: In go the Perishes, Blasts, etc, out go the Muscle Slivers and assorted shit. Get soft Tradewind Lock, work my Volrath's Stronghold to recycle my C-Slivers for the Win I win Round 8: U/G Tradewind #1: Almost won 1st w/2 C-Slivers and a Flier, but I fuck up, oh well #2,3: Perishes work well against a mono-green deck with 4 tradewinds. Goddamn perish kicks ass I win I git into finals wit 7-0-1 record (is that how it works?) Semis Round 1: Undefeated Slighish Deck #1 - My creatures are better than his. C-slivers, counterspells and Winter Orbs work him, wow #2 - Turn 2 warmth, turn 3 crystalline, wow slivers is cool I win Round 2: Another sligh deck, wit scalding tongs and gemstones for sb #1 - Hey look, no creatures, I die #2 - Deck comes out for Daddy, I win #3 - No blue for daddy, wow sucks to lose by color screw, oh well I lose I git 45 WOTC bucks, some packs, admission into nat'ls, free entry into Exodus pre-release. Woo hoo Props: Me, for having the stamina of a thousand burly men Dalmuti's, the new WOTC restaurant (damn good fries) Slops: The Retards who SMEARED SHIT AND PISS on the TOILET SEATS in the FAWKING MEN'S ROOM! JESUS, DON'T THESE PEOPLE KNOW HOW TO FUCKING RELIEVE THEMSELVES without spreading THEIR POO AND WEE-WEE on the FAWKING TOILET SEATS! GODDAMN Seattle Thunder = poop, where'd Mark Justice go anyways Jesse Wilke, for being a bad boy oh, here's the decklist. fill in the quantities yer damn self 12 slivers winter orbs 6 counterspells buncha non-basic land some basic land walls o' blossoms tradewinds couple of terrorizes and some more poop sideboard: next time, put in DREAD IF NIGHT (it kicks ass) ______________________________________________________ Get Your Private, Free Email at http://www.hotmail.com