Subject: PTQ IL TOURNEY REPORT Date: Sun, 01 Feb 1998 03:44:11 -0600 From: Jacob Krejci To: fkusumot@ix.netcom.com PTQ IN TOURNEY REPORT Ahhhhh, My third PTQ, a last minute trip to PTQ IN. Me, my friend Adam, SLAYER and his friend Alan, had all developed a plan on arena night to take a roadtrip down to Indianapolis to play in the PTQ and then turn around and go to Detroit and play in the PTQ there the next day on zero sleep. Unfouratenly, At the last minute I find out Adam can't come, aparently his mom doesn't trust him being alone with our sorted crew. Anyways, After getting 2 hours of sleep and waking up half an hour later I met my "team" in the parking lot of Dairy Queen. Once we cram into the small Jeep and I am wedged between Alan (the MOST irriatting obnoxious, yet bizzarly hilarious human on the planet) and Slayer, I am sort of glad Adam didn't come, cause I have no idea where the hell he would have sat. Anyways, We had a tad trouble finding directions to Indy, so we turned around and headed out to Chicago making this PTQ IL TOURNEY REPORT Anyways we sit down and get a deck tweaking session going I am playing MR. Stompy as usual.....I threw together a fairly useless sideboard and added Sex Monkeys into the main deck which proved to be an AWESOME dissision. SLAYER is playing his stompy, which is very similar to mine, except for his "Super Secret Stompy Stoppers" in his sideboard aka 3 Christmas Trees....aka. Heartwood treakfold. He had proved to me in a local tourney that this card SLAUGHTERS stompy...Not only forestwalk, but the 4 toughness is a bitch. Alan is playing some wacked up mono green stompy wannabe, which I dubbed "Sinirita Stompy" (Although, it was refrered to as Senor Sucky at least once :)). It was like stompy except it had 4 Gea's Touches, Which were supposed to work with Quirion Rangers, and supposely did. He also had in 3.....get this.....FORCES OF NATURE....Which turned out to be the key to his deck. He churned them out fast and used Concordant crossroads to piggyback elves for mass mana producal. OH!!!!! Did I forget to mention that if you win PTQ chicago with a mono green deck you get and EXTRA $250?!?! >:) (Hansen....We're gonna get your money) The talk of the tourney was the "Pro Tour Jank" deck. Everyone was supposely playing them, or playing something to stop them. I don't run into on until my final round, however, Jim, the head jugde for are local tourneys plays jank FOUR times and HE is playing Jank.....It was a janky day for Jim. Ken, the head juged, and loudest human being on the face of the earth announces a new sitting system. Where we find our seats on a chart instead of having him yell them at us...I must say, it made the PTQ MUCH more enjoyable. Hansen, The guy that runs, owns and controls all this gives his normal speach about how wonderful Wotc and Great Lakes games are and how they are concourring the magic world and so on. He also says something that insults public schooling.... FIRST ROUND!!!!!! I play a guy that I had never seen before, He plays alot of duals lands and a couple icies but I sweep him before I can even get the gist of his deck. I'm done in no time, how I love stompy :). Slayer stomp-sweeps someone also. Alan WINS!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD!!!!!!! What the??? We are all on a big ego trip as we ease into.......... ROUND 2!!!!!! I find my seat....I sit there for about 5 minutes starring at a black sleeved deck without and owner across form me. The people around me joke about how its the "deck that plays itself". Next to me, I notice something pretty funny. A kid next to me is using a business card for a token, its refers to him as "The Master of Beatdown" and says "thank you for being a scrub" at the bottom. Well, My opponent shows up and we rumble. He turns out to be the luckiest SOB in chicago. Third turn segir, I loose :_( Second game: Dystopia....Perish.....Perish......I loose :_( Alan and SLAYER loose....We are all forlorned..... I sit around and play my vangaurd Hanna Sliver deck against some unspecting bystanders, when suddenly a kid walks up to me and says...."Hey, Does that say "Scrub" on your name tag?" I quickly reply "NO!!!!! It says Jacob!!!" I glance down http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Lair/7916/scrub.jpg IT DOES LOOK LIKE IT SAYS SCRUB!!!!! Grrrrr....Those lousy tournament organizers had played an evil trick on me....I bet that evil rotten HANSEN is behind this....I need to claim the $500 to get even with him...... Okay...Its been nearly 24 hours sense I slept so I don't know the details in chronilogical order so let me just point out the stand out parts of the tourney I beat a Stompy with red and white splashed in....Why it had white and red splashed in is beyond me. SLAYER beat a stompy deck, with "The Super Secret Stompy Stopper" the Christmas Tree. Get this, Alan BEAT a prop orb deck with a FORCE OF NATURE....WHILE they had a winterorb and a propaganda out!!!!!!! Slayer lost to a double fireblast fork in a close clame, he was really pist about it. I later beat the guy that beat SLAYER. The guy was totally beside himself..."This is the first time I have ever lost to STOMPY". He was bewildered...... SLAYER beat Jank decks and claimed that he absouletely destroyed them. I played Chris Warden, I won the first game, but he managed to come back with his green deck, with red splashed in only for Grander Guildmages and stormbind(Meaning no extra $250 HA!!!). There were no bolts, which shocked me. However he beat me and made it to the top 8 so he must have been doing something right. I was abosuetly destroyed by a mono blue tradewind rider bounce deck. The guy memory lapsed the same muscle sliver twice and then force of willed it. I have come to the conclusion that Stompy is completely deffensless against tradewind rider. I finally played against jank, I destroyed it, conferming that Stompy is Jank's achilles heel. Me and Alan had a load of fun harrasing Hansen (we're coming for yer money, hansen). First we had a complete stranger give him a valentine hear cake and tell him that it was from a secret admirerer....He refused to eat it....THAT HANSEN!!!!!! He foiled me again....... When SLAYER was selling some cards to hanson we noticed something strange....he carries 100 dollars, all in 2 dollar pills with him. He explained that he refuses to use ones because of how much he hated George Washinton....after giveing us a complex explination and insulting public schools again, he left us disturbed. We later explained to him that Quarters also contained a picture of George Washinton.....Hanson gave us another explination on why he can use quarters that left us even more confused and disturbed. Oh yeah, Back to the tournament. SLAYER ended up 6-2....ONE point away from getting to the top 8...GRRRRR....Hansen...You've won the battle but there WILL be a next time...... I ended up 5-3, Not the best, but I was overall proud of my performance. Alan's Sinirita Stompy went 3-5....Better than I expected. Well, We left, disapointed, but overall happy...... We did stop at a nifty little convince store that had the cashier guy encased in 3 inch bullet prrof glass, altough I think we were freaking him and the lady behind us out by our stupidity and freakishness. Especially when Alan said "Hey, this glass is worthless I can just stick my gun up this hole and shoot you right in the face" While sticking his finger throught the change slot and pointing at him. Oh well, We never made it to detroit...But we had a decent time, and it was fun... GOOD LUCK CHRIS....Hope ya take it..... Jacob Krejci, Aparnetly a "Scrub"