The 'Pile of Bitches

The 'Pile of Bitches, named by Elliot Fertik because of its use of4 Aeolipiles as its primary line of defense, and an all-girl lineup ofcreatures as its primary lineup of offense, was the deck that I used inthe Paris qualifiers. Although we did rather well in most of our appearances,the 'Pile and I were never able to make it into the finals. Our best finishwas the final 4 in New York (just one game out qualifying, damn it!), wherewe were bested in a close match by Jon Finkel using Winter Orb-Zuran Orb-Balance.

Although I received many requests during the Paris qualifiers fordeck specifics, this is the first appearance of the 'Pile, specifically,for public critique.

Version 1.0: Philadelphia, PA

This version of the 'Pile was designed to deal with a variety ofdecks.

Artifacts:

4 Aeolipile
R Zuran Orb

White:

4 Armageddon
R Balance
4 Disenchant
R Land Tax
4 Order of Leitbur
4 Order of White Shield
4 Serra Angel
4 Swords to Plowshares
2 Wrath of God

Land:

4 Kjeldoran Outpost
4 Mishra's Factory
18 Plains
R Strip Mine

Sideboard:

R Black Vise
4 Nevinyrral's Disk
4 Serrated Arrows
2 Winter Orb
2 Abbey Gargoyle
2 Wrath of God

Version 2.0: New York, NY

After realizing that neither the Necrodeck nor the Sligh deck posedany sort of a threat to the 'Pile of Bitches, I decided to go more anti-control.In this light, I switched the Black Vise to the main deck, and added DivineOffering to the sideboard... With 4 Serrated Arrows and my main deck anti-creaturemeasures, 2 additional Wraths of God seemed redundant. Conversion was thebrainchild of John Shuler. It represented, at that time, an utter lockagainst mono-red, which had done very well in Philadelphia. After my extensiveuse of Conversion in New York, most Sligh players added Cities of Brassand Dwarven Ruins to their mana makeups.

Artifacts:

R Black Vise
4 Aeolipile
R Zuran Orb

White:

4 Armageddon
R Balance
4 Disenchant
R Land Tax
4 Order of Leitbur
4 Order of White Shield
4 Serra Angel
4 Swords to Plowshares
2 Wrath of God

Land:

4 Kjeldoran Outpost
4 Mishra's Factory
18 Plains
R Strip Mine

Sideboard:

4 Nevinyrral's Disk
4 Serrated Arrows
2 Winter Orb
3 Conversion
2 Divine Offering

Version 2.1: Edison, NJ

My loss to Jon Finkel in New York convinced me that I needed additionalDivine Offerings in the sideboard. I removed the Winter Orbs, which hadallowed me an easy victory over Fred Foure's Turbo-Stasis deck in New York,theorizing that Divine Offerings are very effective against Stasis decksanyway. Fred won the Edison qualifier with that Stasis deck!

Artifacts:

R Black Vise
4 Aeolipile
R Zuran Orb

White:

4 Armageddon
R Balance
4 Disenchant
R Land Tax
4 Order of Leitbur
4 Order of White Shield
4 Serra Angel
4 Swords to Plowshares
2 Wrath of God

Land:

4 Kjeldoran Outpost
4 Mishra's Factory
18 Plains
R Strip Mine

Sideboard:

4 Nevinyrral's Disk
4 Serrated Arrows
3 Conversion
4 Divine Offering

Version 2.1: District of Columbia

I made no changes to the 'Pile for DC.

Artifacts:

R Black Vise
4 Aeolipile
R Zuran Orb

White:

4 Armageddon
R Balance
4 Disenchant
R Land Tax
4 Order of Leitbur
4 Order of White Shield
4 Serra Angel
4 Swords to Plowshares
2 Wrath of God

Land:

4 Kjeldoran Outpost
4 Mishra's Factory
18 Plains
R Strip Mine

Sideboard:

4 Nevinyrral's Disk
4 Serrated Arrows
3 Conversion
4 Divine Offering

For additional information on the 'Pile of Bitches, check out theParis PTQ reports, or the 'Pile of Bitches revealed!