Subject: Team Dickhead report/call out From: "Brian Hacker" Date: 1997/04/28 Hello all. Once again the masters of one eight seven, droppin' bombs on your moms, puttin the M in mackin' cause when you wuz all doin' it you were only actin', those playerz wit attitude team dickhead give you yet another exciting tourny report. Team Dickhead was at half strength this time. John Yoo didn't want to go to burger king, cause he had a serloin steak at home (if you know what I'm talking about) and Jason Zila is well... not old enough to appreciate the charm of Las Vegas. Truc Bui sporting his fabulous new Team Dickhead shirt and myself Brian Hacker showed up at the tourny hoping to keep all and sundry from qualifying. A new death pool was created and the winner got a twenty. Here we go... I have a decent red/green/blue deck. I sacrifice the sacred cows of black to play with a good mana structure and savage twister. Highlights of the swiss beatdown... Round two: Mario Robiana PCLer Two points Mario has a pretty lousy draw the first game. The second, the savage twister kills him. I had control of the board when I shot it off and quickly won afterward. Cpt. Cali 2-0 matches 4-0 games Two Death Pool Points Round three: Dan Grey: Read: Level Four Judge Read: Five big points. Dan and I forget to drop lands on the third turn and it looks like we both suck. Fortunately I draw land before he does and the game ends quickly. The second game I keep putting creatures out, but he hold me off with a stupid gossamer chains and Talrum Champion. Finally I get my Grinning Totem and snag his Goblin Scouts Cpt. Cali 3-0 matches 6-0 games Seven Death Pool Points Round four: Scott Johns PCLer Four Points Scott and I have an epic first game. We both have two decent flyers and he drops Mist Dragon. I thirst it before he can untap and then both sit. I draw the totem and snag his boa and kill him with it. The second game he draws only blue land and a Cyrstal Golem. I draw only the ksycu drake, savage twist, thirst and a triangle of war. It looks like the Golem might be Dejon, but finally I draw my Igneas Golem and kill it. Cpt Cali 4-0 matches 8-0 games Eleven Death Pool Points (A new team dickhead record) I end up perfect after five 5-0,10-0 games, and draw into the third seed. I enter the rochester portion of the draft rather weary. I had been gambling for twenty hours and hadn't slept in two days. My nerves finally go and I lose to Preston in an exciting but poorly played game. Oh well. My streak of final eight appearances continued at five. Truc didn't fare so well as he was still tired from all the gambling. The trip was better than our recent one as far as gambling and I was even after a clutch twenty dollar hard eight. Congrats to Nate Clarke, Worth Wollpert, Dennis Bently, Tony Tsai, Dave Price, and Mike Long for their excellent Prix. Pronounced Pree not pricks. Now for the call out portion of the post. Word on the street is that Nate is slippin. After that round of four loss, word is that you can be taken out any time, so Nate Team Dickhead is callin yo ass out. Let's start talkin about the N.Y. challenge. Bring all your pre-pubescent friends out and lets have a rumble. I'm talkin one-twenty-five a head. Four on four. Thursday Night. Cause I know that half your team is goin' back to the farm and their sisters come Saturday. So, we've thrown the gauntlet down. What say you, homeboy? Hacker Team Dickhead P.S. How was that Dukes Of Hazard renunion? "When illegally armed its called packin' " -N.W.A.