Subject: Da Finkel Killuh Date: Sat, 19 Sep 1998 12:13:25 -0500 From: "Jusin Sante" To: fkusumot@ix.netcom.com -------------------------------------------------------------------- Da Finkel Killuh, by Justin Sante Yeah, they call me the Magic King. The Big King. Da Finkel Killer. The Big King Magic Finkel Killuh. Yeah, dats what dey call me round this muhfuckuh. I've never lost a game. If I had friends, and they saw me with a magic deck, dey would run across da street screamin! I'm THAT GOOD. I got dis game locked DOWN. Dey didn't expect to see a killuh like me round here. I run dis bitch, dawg, people's are always seein me and going "That's HIM!!!!!! Get da fuck out of his way!!" Cuz they know I'd kick their ass with ANY of my decks. After studyin' the Rath Meta Game, I came up wit dis KILLUH deck. It has never lost, there's nothin anybody can do about it. It beats Sly, AwakeTrade, Suicidal Blacks and all da udder decks on da Dojo. 59 - Swamp (Can't be countered I think! Broken!!!!) 1 - Nightmare (For only 6 manas it can be like a 6/6! Broken!!!!!) To play dis deck, just put down all your swamps on da first turn, den play the nightmare. Dis way, you get a big fatty, and yur opponent is like "Oh God! What am I gunna do against da Finkel Killah?!?" Watch out for playas that can kill your Nightmare!!!! When I opened my first pack, three weeks ago, I was like HOLY SHIT! I'm gonna kick EVERYBODY'S ass, I've got a SHOCK! Dat can kill almost every creature!!! Even den, I knew I was gonna be da best Magic player EVER. I found da Dojo, and read about this guy named Finkel, and I was like, his decks SUCK! My SwampMare deck could beat it EVERY TIME! Here's another deck dat could kick Finkel's ass! 4 - Impulse (Everyone says dis is broken, so I think it's broken too!) 4 - Prosperity (Card advantage!!!) 4 - Intuition (Lets you draw your Prosperity!! Broken!) 4 - Ancestral Recall (You can force them to draw too!!!!) 4 - Sift (Card advantage!!!) 4 - Inspiration (Portal tech!!!) 4 - Brainstorm (Card advantage!!!) 4 - Oath of Scholars (If you run out of cards!) 4 - Treasure Trove (There's 4 islands in this deck, why not?) 4 - Dream Cache (Better than Impulse!!!) 4 - Fools Tome (If you're out of cards!) 4 - Meditate (Draw four cards, BROKEN!) 4 - Whispers of the Muse (I don't understand buyback, but I think its BROKEN!) 4 - Spellbook (Dis way, you can have up to like 10 cards in hand!) 4 - Island (You can cast EVERYTHING with these!!!) Da idea of dis deck is to get a CARD ADVANTAGE!! I read about this on the Dojo, it like lets you win every time, so like I said why not make a deck that lets you draw lots of cards? Well I couldn't because I only have 60 cards, but if I had those cards, that's the deck I'd make! And even though I only gots a job delivering papers and can't buy expensive cards like Chaoslace, I can still kick your ass! I hope all you stupid ass scrubs out there can figure out how to play these decks, even after a Mastuh like me has explained them. I know how stupid you all are.