Subject: Tellin' it like it is Date: Tue, 14 Jul 1998 03:20:22 -0700 From: To: fkusumot@ix.netcom.com I just finished reading Hacker's silliness on becoming lil' Mikey Long's clone. Gotta admit it caught me by surprise. Obviously it's a load of crap. Anyone who knows Hacker knows he is the last person in this sport that would become what he hates most. Hacker's idea wasn't a bad one though. I'm figuring he was hoping to annoy the DCI by telling them how it's gonna be and there's not a damn thing they can do about it. Reverse psychology on the DCI, you gotta love it. Alright, anyone who knows me knows that I tell it like it is so i'll stop waltzing around. Everyone knows lil' Mikey "Flash" Long is one of the most corrupt players in the game. Even his grandmama knows it. Hell, his granny probably showed him how to cheat when they played bridge together during his childhood. "Flash" reminds me of a friend I used to have named Chuck. It took my friends and myself about seven years to figure out that Chuck was nothing but a lying thief that stole as much as he could for as long as he could and denied it to the very end. I had such a hard time understanding how anyone could actually care about no one but themself. Now keep in mind no one has accused Flash of stealing there wallet or anything like that, but actually, when he cheats on the Tour he is stealing from his opponent a higher finish which usually means more money. I don't think Flash has played in a major tournament in the last two and a half years where he wasn't accused of cheating. But lil' Mikey Flash Long just denies it to the very end. Hmmm, that reminds me of a story from June of last year. Hacker, Flash, Justice, and myself were out in Cali' to do the MTV Magic commercials. You know, the one where I smashed Justice and then got the girl. Actually, WOTC had scripted it that Justice would beat me and then get the girl, but the MTV producer wanted to keep it more realistic. Anyhow, back to the subject. After the shoot Flash, Hacker, and myself met up with Preston Poulter and a girl he knew to grab some supper. Somewhere during the night Flash brought up Justin Schneider's name and something about what a good kid he was. Well, that ended the nice peaceful dinner. I told Flash that Justin was a lil' cheating bastard. He asked what proof I had. So I told him how I watched Justin cheat against Jeremy Baca in the junior PT in Dallas right on the big screen. In game five Justin capped Baca's deck and found four cards he wanted to take out to insure his victory. Obviously he could only take three so when he finished capping he placed the millstone he left in the deck on the bottom of Baca's deck and started to do a bunch of side hand shuffles and left the stone on the bottom. Baca had already done a bunch of land taxing earlier and every time Justin finished shuffling Baca's deck Jeremy never cut it. I saw what Justin did with the shuffling on the big screen and I started yelling about what he did to no avail. Baca didn't cut his deck and I watched on as the crowd kept yelling for Baca to topdeck the millstone. Justin won many turns later. I talked to Baca later on and he said he kept hoping to draw the stone and when the match was over he found it at the bottom of his deck. I spoke with Michael Sachon, Marc Hernandez, and Leon Lindback later that night about what happened, and then they all looked at each other. I of course said what's up, and the told me how they showed Justin the night before to beware of people who shuffle their deck that way and Justin stayed in their room for the next two and a half hours and just practiced shuffling. Flash of course jumped to his lil' protoge's defense and said it wasn't true. Then he admitted that Justin used to cheat, but Flash broke him of that. I laughed and said once a cheater always a cheater. The tension was getting pretty thick and our voices were getting pretty loud which was fine with me cause I was pretty bored with the weekend anyway. Flash yelled again he doesn't do that anymore. I repeated my childhood rhyme once a cheater always a cheater. Flash yells out, oh ya', well I used to cheat!!! You could have heard a pin drop. Hacker and I looked at each other and smiled. Then I asked Flash when he stopped and he said right before Nationals. Needless to say that ended dinner. Hacker and I went to a bar later on and tried to figure out which Nationals he was talking about. While we were there some zipperheads bought us a couple drinks because they recognized us from the MTV Beach House and i'm sure they figured they were making some acting connections. Ahh what a life, someone's always looking to get something from you. So Flash got caught with his hand in the cookie jar again last week and now the USofA has another spot wasted by trash on the National team. Oh WOTC, grow up and take care of this ongoing crap. You're only encouraging this by not dealing with it with a stiff hand. 'Nuff said, i'm sick of the subject. "Hammer" Regnier