Subject: How To Cheat At Magic Date: Fri, 10 Jul 1998 12:56:30 -0700 From: "Boogie" To: Since the DCI has decided cheating isn't so bad after all, I guess we should all start doing it. Now, I've never cheated at _MAGIC_ , but lord knows that I've cheated at other games. So, I figure if anyone is gonna teach your average chumly to cheat, it should be me :) 1) Get some glue. Glue the neccessary card to your inner palm. Now, while your palm may not be card sized, its allright to double fold, or even quad fold your cards. This may tend to mark them, but, well hell, the glue screws em pretty hard anyways. 2) Bribe your opponent. Offer him drugs, money, prostitutes of shivans. Whatever works. Most players will usually throw a game in exchange for 2-3 lords of the pit (thus the high dollar value in inquest) 3) Intemidate your opponent. Mentally at first, then Physically. Use such phrase as 'What kind of car do you drive?" And "I wonder how well that combo works when its up your rectum" 4) Cut Your Cards. No, don't shuffle then _CUT_ instead, cut the edges off the cards. This is a trick magic users have used for years. Usually, they can easily feel the edge of a card that has been shaved 1/20 of an inch, but for the beginner, try something easier. For land, remove the top left corner (where the name of the land is)... A square about 1/4 inch should do. Creatures should be cut at the bottom right (removing power/toughness). Spells should be removed in the top right corner (casting cost) This way you can confuse your opponent as well. "Uh, I think its a 12/12" 5) Pay the wrong price for your spells. Armageddon only costs three. Ouhpidan can be cast with 2 mountains. This removes the need for cards like undiscovered paradise and such... You'll always have the right mana! 6) use foreign cards. Lie about what they do. Don't even bring an english version with you to the tournament, and only use cards most people don't recognize. Heat wave can become the next mana flare, Glyph of life can become a swords to plowshares, Hell, the great wall is even useful this way! :) Just remember, there's apparantly no reason to play this game fair. So many players have been cheating for so long, and getting paid to do it... Its time to get your share too. for more useful cheating techinques send 25 Feast or famines (any foreign language) to Me My House 111 My Street My Town, My State MY Country 2 4 6 8 10